二十 阿迪亚帕克吉
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中文
XX
比肯街17号，波士顿，
1894年5月。
亲爱的阿迪亚帕克吉（约翰·亨利·赖特教授），
您想必已收到那本小册子和那些信件。如您有意，我可从芝加哥为您转来印度王公及大臣们的信件——其中一位大臣曾是近年在皇家委员会主持下于印度召开的鸦片委员会的成员之一。如您愿意，我可请他们写信给您，以证明我并非骗子。然而，我的兄长，我们的人生理想是隐忍、压抑、拒绝。
我们当舍弃而非索取。若非心中怀有那份"执念"，我断不会来到此地。正是出于这一执念或许有助于我的事业，我才参加了宗教会议——尽管我们的同胞曾多次劝说我出席，我均一一拒绝。最终我告诉他们："我去了可能参加，也可能不参加那次集会——如果你们愿意，可以送我去。"他们便送我来了，完全让我自由行事。
其余的，是您促成的。
我的好友，我在道义上有责任给予您充分的满足；但对于世界其余之人，他们说什么，我全不在乎——游方僧（Sannyasin）不可自我辩护。因此，我恳请您不要公开或向任何人展示那本小册子或那些信件中的任何内容。我不在乎那位老传教士的种种图谋；但嫉妒之热病侵袭马祖姆达尔一事，给了我极大的震动，我祈望他能迷途知返——因为他是一位伟大而善良的人，毕生致力于行善积德。然而此事印证了我师父的一句话："住在一间满是黑色煤灰的屋子里——无论你多么谨慎——总有一些污迹会沾在你的衣服上。"因此，无论一个人多么努力地追求善与圣洁，只要他仍身处世间，他的本性总有一部分会向下沉沦。
通向神的道路与世俗的道路恰恰相反。能够同时拥有神与财富的人，寥寥无几。
我从来不是传教士，也永不会成为传教士——我的归处在喜马拉雅山。就目前而言，我已心满意足，可以问心无愧地说："我的主，我目睹了兄弟们所受的苦难；我寻到了解脱之道，竭尽所能地尝试施治，却未能成功。一切，遵从您的旨意。"
愿祂的祝福永远与您及您的家人同在。
您深情的，
辨喜
迪尔伯恩大道541号，芝加哥
明日或后日我前往芝加哥。
您的
辨喜
English
XX
17 BEACON STREET, BOSTON,
May, 1894.
DEAR ADHYAPAKJI (Prof. John Henry Wright),
By this time you have got the pamphlet and the letters. If you like, I would send you over from Chicago some letters from Indian Princes and ministers — one of these ministers was one of the Commissioners of the late opium commission that sat under Royal Commission in India. If you like, I will have them write to you to convince you of my not being a cheat. But, my brother, our ideal of life is to hide, to suppress, and to deny.
We are to give up and not to take. Had I not the "Fad" in my head, I would never have come over here. And it was with a hope that it would help my cause that I joined the Parliament of Religions — having always refused it when our people wanted to send me for it. I came over telling them — "that I may or may not join that assembly — and you may send me over if you like". They sent me over leaving me quite free.
You did the rest.
I am morally bound to afford you every satisfaction, my kind friend; but for the rest of the world I do not care what they say — the Sannyasin must not have self-defence. So I beg of you not to publish or show anybody anything in that pamphlet or the letters. I do not care for the attempts of the old missionary; but the fever of jealousy which attacked Mazoomdar gave me a terrible shock, and I pray that he would know better — for he is a great and good man who has tried all his life to do good. But this proves one of my Master's sayings, "Living in a room covered with black soot — however careful you may be — some spots must stick to your clothes." So, however one may try to be good and holy, so long he is in the world, some part of his nature must gravitate downwards.
The way to God is the opposite to that of the world. And to few, very few, are given to have God and mammon at the same time.
I was never a missionary, nor ever would be one — my place is in the Himalayas. I have satisfied myself so far that I can with a full conscience say, "My God, I saw terrible misery amongst my brethren; I searched and discovered the way out of it, tried my best to apply the remedy, but failed. So Thy will be done."
May his blessings be on you and yours for ever and ever.
Yours affectionately,
VIVEKANANDA.
541 DEARBORN AVE., CHICAGO
I go to Chicago tomorrow or day after.
Yours
V.
文本来自Wikisource公共领域。原版由阿德瓦伊塔修道院出版。